A father passing by his teenage daughter's bedroom was surprised to see the bed nicely made and everything was neat and tidy. Then he saw an enveloped note conspicuously placed on the pillow. It was addressed 'Dad' With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands to read.
Dear Dad,
I write to you with a lot of regret. But I am leaving home. I had to elope with with my new boyfriend Randy I have been finding real passion with Randy, he is so nice to me. When you meet you will like him too - even with all his piercings, tatoos, and Rasta hairdos. But the good news is that I am pregnant for him and he wants me to have the kid so we can be happily married and have about 10 more.
Though Randy is older than me (around 59 or there about) and he is a bit broke, these shouldn't stand in the way of our relationship, don't you agree? It is true he has other girlfriends, but I know he will be faithful to me.
Randy taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and he'll be growing it for us and we will trade it with our friends in exchange for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. Isn't that beautiful? Meanwhile join us in prayers that science will find a cure for HIV, so Randy can get better; he sure deserves it!
Don't worry Dad I'm 15 now and I can take of myself with Randy there for me. Someday we will be back to visit you, so you can know your grandchildren.
Your lovely daughter
Rosie
At the bottom of the page were the letters 'PTO'
Hands still trembling her father turned over the sheet and read
Dad, NONE OF THE ABOVE IS TRUE. I am over at the neighbours house next door. I just wanted to use that to remind you that THERE ARE WORST THINGS IN LIFE than my END OF YEAR EXAMINATIONS REPORT CARD that is in my desk centre drawer. Please kindly read it, sign it and call me on my phone when it is safe for me return home.
I love you.
Rosie.
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